Wife finds condoms and women’s jewelry in husband’s draw

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Wife finds condoms and women’s jewelry in husband’s draw

Dear Willie: I don’t usually confide in people but the fact that I don’t know you is a bit comforting. I’ve been with my husband for 12 years, married for seven and have a five-year-old child together.

Willie, the past 12 years of my life was amazing, the night he proposed to me was the night I realised that I have the perfect man and I vowed to be the perfect bride. As we both know no one is perfect, but I swear our life is perfect. I am faithful to him, I cook for him, clean for him, take care of him and treat him how a queen must treat her king; he treats me like a queen in return.

Lately I noticed a slight changed in his behavior: he comes home later than usual and eats a lot less now. Being the good woman that I am I didn’t ask him anything about the change in his behaviour because I didn’t want to have an uncalled for argument.

Every six months I clean out his underwear drawer to surprise him with new ones – out with the old and in with the new. He gets excited each time and puts on a show to show me how they each fit.

Cleaning out the drawer this time, I found some condoms and women’s jewelry. How strange is that? I know the condoms are not for me because in our seven years of marriage we never use a condom and I know the jewelry is not for me because I am a Seventh Day Adventist and I don’t wear jewelry.

Willie, I was so upset that I stood there in front the dresser jumping to conclusions. I figured out he’s seeing someone else and that’s the reason he’s coming home later and eating less; he must be eating somewhere else. I hoped that he had a logical reasoning towards my findings.

I threw out his old boxers and placed the new ones in as planned, and put the jewelry and condoms on top so that he will see that I saw them. When my husband got home that evening I was in the living room watching news, I kept my calm and acted normal.

He sat by me and together we watched the remaining news. He then got up and asked me to join him in shower but I was so upset that I refused. When he finished his bath I went upstairs to the room to see his reaction.

Willie, he acted like he did not notice the new boxers nor the condoms and jewelry. Now am extra mad because I did not get my show or an explanation. I felt like removing my boxers on him but I managed to control my anger.

It’s been two weeks and he has barely spoken to me. Now am furious because he won’t even try to talk to me. Willie I am not the nagging type and I never accused my husband of cheating on me. I really don’t want to be the first to bring up the conversation between us, which I know will result in an argument. I am tired of the silence between my husband and I so therefore I need some advice.

Should I ask him about my findings? Should I automatically assume that he’s cheating? Or Should I continue to live in silence?

Sincerely

Tired of the Silence

Dear Miss: You went about the situation the wrong way. You probably felt it was the best way to avoid an all-out confrontation, however it yielded nothing.

Silence from either party achieves nothing. That is not effective communication.

Obviously, he wants to avoid an argument (typical men). However, it is in your right to get answers.

So what to do? Whenever he gets home and is relaxed, ask for a few minutes of his time. Tell him what you discovered and ask him for an explanation. Also state that you’re not looking for an argument, you just want the truth.

What baffles me though is where he had the condoms and jewelry. Why would he put them there knowing your routine? My guess is that a woman was in ya’ll apartment and she possibly left it there so that you could find out and break the relationship apart.

Women are notorious for appearing to forget their personal items at men’s places. Most times it is their IMMATURE way, as the jabal, of sending a message to the girlfriend or wifey. It’ not a good message either.

Don’t be furious. He got married to you for a reason. Just have a talk with him. The longer the silence, the deeper the tensions and the end-result will be more damaging.

Willie

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41 COMMENTS

  1. bullshit!u deserve better!n no matter wat u do or how u do it...if a man has 2 cheat,he will.......speak 2 him n gt 2 d bottom of fings!!!!!!!!!!!he needs 2 b @ ur beck n call right nw.i wud start by nt doin shit 4 him...includin cookin,washin etc.nt bcuz u adventist does it mean u hv 2 b totally submissive 2 the man.u mke it sound lik its all about pleasin him.what about u and ur emotions.woman,u are the queen.now stop being so weak.stand up 2 him.b firm.b assertive ,b vunerable but show him u are strong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    • Yes, he make a mistake, he was an ass, so your advice to the lady is to act like an ass in return. You are single I am sure.

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  2. Maybe the wife is afraid of what her husband might say, he is not talking to her, which basically means he is angrier at her than she is angry with him. The wife is probably afraid of what the husband might say, maybe he wanted wifey to find out, maybe he is looking for a way out. My advice to you wifey is speak to your husband expect the worst and hope for the best. Good Luck

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  3. Seventh Day Adventist are human too you know. all you sluts are the ones breaking up people marriage and relationship.

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  4. Beautifully made you sound like you are a jabel or have been one your whole life ! Know your worth as the jabel and stay out of the conversion until you are given permission to speak ...

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  5. A "so-called," Adventist woman is washing her dirty laundry in public.
    What next?

    And one wonders why everyone has lost Faith in the Church?

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    • aa. so she supposed to keep it hush hush. EHDISKWAY! smh. she right to put it online. dats EXACTLY y ppl 'lost faith in the church'. cuz of ppl like u dat encourage keepin fings undercover...let us pray. Let's go to God. im not sayin dont go but wth. choops tun. MAJEE.

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      • A good woman would act like a "good woman."
        Take it to the Lord in prayer and discuss it with her Husband.
        Not putting it on Blast and making a complete fool of herself.

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        • Where she put it on blast? Do u know who she is? and do u think that Adventist couples, Muslim couples, Rasta couples, Catholic,Pentecost and atheists dont all go through the same problems. Try to step with your damm childish judgmental self.

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  6. MY LADY MEN USUALLY TAKE A GREAT WOMAN'S LOYALTY FOR GRANTED. WHAT IS DISTRIBING ABOUT THAT ENTIRE SITUATION IS THE FACT THAT THE JEWELLER AND CONDOM ARE IN HIS DRAW. Y WOULD HE BRING HER IN UR HOME, UR BEDROOM. THAT'S TOTAL DISRESPECT. I ASSUME THAT IF HE DIDN'T WANT TO GET CAUGHT HE WOULD HAVE REMOVE THE CONDOMS AND JEWELLRY SINCE HE KNOWS THAT U USUALLY CHANGE HIS UNDERGARMENTS. MEN ARE CARELESS BUT I THINK THAT THE JABAL WAS AT THE HOUSE RECENTLY THAT MIGHT BE ONE OF THE REASON Y UR HUSBAND DID NOT REMOVE THE JEWELLERY AND CONDOMS. THE CONDOMS ARE THERE FOR ANOTHER ROUND OF CHEATING IN YOUR HOUSE AND UR ROOM BECAUSE HE WAS HOPING THAT THE JABAL WOULD HAVE RETURN SOON FOR COLLECTION OF THE JEWELLERY AND THE USE OF THE CONDOM. MEN ARE SO SICK. NOT BECAUSE HE MARRIED U AND THINGS HAVE BEEN PERFECT MEANS THAT HE CANNOT CHEAT. COMING HOME LATER THAN USUAL AND EATING LESS CLEARLY STATES THAT HE'S MAKING TIME FOR SOMEONE ELSE AND EATING OUT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL MAKE SOME MEN REALISED THAT THEY HAVE A GREAT WOMAN. HE NEED TO TELL U THE TRUTH AND FIX HIS SHIT , IF HE CANNOT DO THAT U SHOULD GO RUNNING. U DESERVE BETTER.

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  7. wow. it really does sound like da perfect story. lady, SPEAK to ur husband. QUESTION da man and find out te trut. you found condoms and jewellery. e is puttin YOU, your child, himself and dat person e cheatin wif at risk. PLEASE speak up. dont keep it us us to save face or bcus of appearances or bcus u SDA or bcus u dont believe in divorce or wuteva (idk). but speak to im. e needs to tell u da truth. n wen e does, let im know to put a stop to it n u decide from there. do urll continue to work on ur marriage? or divorce? if urll decide to stick togeda i ope da two of u get tested, not once only. but 3 months afta da 1st time n den 3 mnths again. some diseases ave a window period so u really need to be sure. all da best to u.

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  8. Sweety you should have never letn time pass on that...men lie to the T YOU JUST GAVE HIM MORE TIME TO FABRICATE A LIE.The thing we dont get as women you can cook food in diamond sauce bounce on the ting like a spring once a man want to cheat nothing can stop him ...I PERSONALLY WONT TELL YOU LIVE YOUR MAN BUT YOU HAVE TO SHOW HIM WHO IS WOMAN somethimes when you are passive like this you end up being the door mat...be strong and face the situation.....

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  9. I believe communication is key rather than being silence .. silence is death, and you can't have death in your house. Your believe in Christ so bring life back into your family, by talking to him ..

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdLKOBM5_t8

    Ps. This is just a funny side to this story.

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  10. I WOULD OF TOLD HIM WE WOULD OF ARGUE THE HOLE NIGHT I WANT TO HOW THE CONDOMS REACH THERE AND WHOSE JEWELRY MAYBE EVEN FIGHT TOO

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  11. But u make d man feel that wat he is doing is ok and u accept it. I would have his same reaction and look to avoid the whole thing until something else comes up and takes the attention away. As a man, I can tell u that we dont really wanna cheat, and we know when we have a good woman. sometimes we just cant help it and all these half naked women walkin around doesnt make it easier. Do u know that some married men choose to stay in doors at times in order to resist temptation. I am not trtying to make excuses, its just something that only a man will understand. If u dont want an argument, choose an appropriate setting. A restaurant or other public area where u can talk, and neither of u will want to make a scene. Tell him straight, u dont want to leave, but u juss want the marjee to stop cuz u deseve better. Let him feel free to open up even though it hurts u. He may need that as much as u do. I am tellin u this cuz thats what i would want my wife to do if she ever caught my ass like that.

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  12. Lady you did the exact thing a lot of women / Jabals are notorious for ...you put the jewellry and condoms on his undies. Bad move...your are immature. You handeld it badly. Now he has seen another side of you. Also, because all this time has passed its given him time to think of some shit to tell you and this may make matters worse. All that time you angry he nicing up with the other woman.