Dear Willie: I’m a 17-year-old. I had a boyfriend for nine months and then we broke up because he thought I was cheating on him with my best guy friend. But I was never cheating on him. And now, after he got to know the truth, he wants me back. I’ve always loved him and I was happy to have him back.
There is this hot guy who loves me. He’s so attractive. We kissed a few times after I broke up with my boyfriend and I still keep meeting him. We cuddle. I love my boyfriend but I can’t stop meeting this guy. And my boyfriend doesn’t know anything about this!
I am totally lost. How do I stop this urge to meet him? I feel guilty about what I’ve done so far. I want to change!! Please help me!
Dear Miss: The change has to begin with you. Only you can change yourself. The fact you have recognized your wrong, then now is the time to deal with it head-on.
I believe you just have a crush on this new guy because he is attractive. Lust and crushes do not last long. You never mentioned if you and him had sex. If you haven’t, then that’s good, keep it that way. The moment you and him start having sex, the more emotionally attached you will be.
This guy might be hot but what if he is just playing you? What if he just wants to get some sex? So be very careful.
If you truly love your boyfriend you will stop meeting this new guy. For you to stop meeting this guy, you must be brutally honest with him. Tell him you love your boyfriend and you want to stop hurting him by meeting someone else behind his back. You must cut all communications with this new guy in order for you to stay away.
A lot of girls go out and fall for new guys, because they want something fresh, something new and exciting. However, they will rarely leave their significant other for the new guy, especially if they have no issues with their current relationship.
But sometimes this new feeling for excitement can turn sour.
So my advice is, if you love your boyfriend, stop meeting this guy by first telling him the truth about your feelings for your boyfriend. It is also good to tell him that if you can cheat on your boyfriend that means you have the potential to do the same to him as well, so it is best to cut the communication.
Remember this guy is also judging you. If he knows he can do all this with you knowing you have a boyfriend, in the back of his head, he has probably written you off as a potential girlfriend. He is probably thinking you will do the same thing to him. So he is probably only focused on one thing now: getting sex and more sex – if he hasn’t gotten some by the time I post this letter.
If you don’t love your boyfriend please give the guy a break and remain single.
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