Dear Willie: I have been married for seven years. In the beginning of the marriage, it was a bliss of heaven, but I realised after four years in my marriage that I am not in love with my husband.
I am in love with someone else. We have been friends for a long time, even before I met my husband. I have never cheated on my husband, but sometimes we mistake somebody’s kindness for love.
Dear Miss: Being friends and living with someone every day are two different scenarios. I have seen people in relationships for 10 years and when they finally get married and move in with each other, things go sour.
If you and your husband could stay in love for four years, then I do not see why you cannot last another four years or more. There must be a reason why you no longer feel the way you did many years ago. You haven’t indicated that in your letter. So it is difficult for me to address “a problem” when there is no specific problem, other than your concern that you no longer love him.
Marriage is a very serious thing. Females in particular love getting married. But they soon learn later it is not a bed of rose. It is something you have to be mentally, physically, emotionally and financially prepared for. Being in love is not enough reason to get married. Marriage is a lifetime commitment.
I urge you to try and fix your marriage. If it’s not working out, do what’s best for you. However, always bear in mind that the grass is not always greener on the other side. It may look green from a distance, but walking through the grass might reveal little things that you may not be able to deal with it.
Email letters to [email protected] Letters are strictly confidential and total privacy maintained. Also see disclaimer below.
Dear Willie is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday exclusively on this site. The responses by this column are the opinion of the author of Dear Willie and are not to be thought of as counseling or advice. The opinion is based on limited information provided by the user. By requesting a response, the user agrees that both Dr. Willie and Andrews Media Services Corp/St. Lucia News Online are not to be held liable for any damages to the user or any third party associated with the user.