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“Everyone making it look like I am the bad one” – mother speaks about troubles with son

By Kingsley Emmanuel
Raveneau

Raveneau

Frustrated, angry and dejected.

That’s exactly how Tammara Raveneau says she feels after her nine-year-son was taken from her care several years ago for what was described by the police and the Department of Human Services as physical and verbal abuse.

She said over the years, she has made at least seven court appearances on the matter which has left her “fed up”. Her last court appearance was Wednesday, and according to her she has more to make.

According to Raveneau, the court gave her the right to visit her child for 30-minutes under supervision after six months. She added that the court also ordered her to take a course at the National Skills Development Centre (NSDC) in Vieux-Fort and classes on parenting, which she has completed.

“No…that’s not enough time to see my child… ” she said.

She said her child was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and adjustment disorder.

Raveneau, who had her right hand amputated several years ago after it was infected with a tumor, lamented she had to do certain things she would not do under normal condition to raise her two children. The unemployed mother said her physical condition makes it difficult for her to get a job.

“I took it real hard…” she lamented.

She admitted that she has assaulted her son over the years, but not to the extent that it was described by the police, and she did so, only after she was assaulted and abused by him.

“When I beat him he would beat me back…” she said.

Raveneau, who described her son as a “miserable child” said over the years, he has been in the care of three foster parents and the New Beginning Transit Home, alleging that he was abused at the home. She said some of the things he has done to her and names he has called her are unbelievable.

She showed this reporter a cell phone video of him packing some of his clothes to throw away.

According to Raveneau, her son, who attends a primary school in the south of the island, has been a problem child from the age of three.

“Everyone making it look like I am the bad one. I am not…” she said.

Raveneau said the police described her son’s behaviour as “rebellious”.

(9)(28)
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34 comments

  1. Just a caring friend.

    Tammy this is ur time to chart ur life and family. U must change so that things around u can. God allowed the loss of your right arm for a reason, look around you, appreciate what you have, your mother and children. Be humble seek their forgiveness and their love and obedience will follow. Your mum gets help because she is a simple and humble woman. She may not be perfect but you can learn a few things from her. GOD CAN HELP IF YOU SEEK HIM.

    (2)(0)
  2. Listen!! Everyone is giving their opinions but at the end of the day it looks like both mother and son Need help, so instead of blaming and criticizing, try to help the situation, mother not working ( financial she's indeed of help) child clearly is emotionally distressed.

    (5)(0)
    • This mother needs no sympathy. She is the result of what he has become today. Ask her why should a caring mother kick a two year old who was only at the time crying for her love and attention. At that time she had both arms. This is just about one percent of the abuse this poor child has endured.

      I need to say also that criminals are not born, they are bred. It's not fault of this child that he was conceived from one of her so called survival efforts. To those of us who know her better she is pure evil and will get no sympathy whatsoever. She should be in prison! Sick woman!

      Just have a talk with her mother and everyone will understand how evil this woman truly is.

      (4)(0)
  3. Why we are so negative. Everyone is not the Same . Say thanks god we are normal people.i think they both need some help, it's like we have answers to everything.at least they are humans too

    (0)(1)
  4. leave the dam woman alone stop bashing her regaurdless she get bad on ppl for her kid is her .her kid fight hwr back is her go help hwr some of us our closet fool of dirty laundry but is us that want to clean other ppl oqn smh

    (5)(4)
  5. leave the lady alone go mind you all dam bussiness..we quick to judge see the wonan she is phisicaly challeng no work frustrated ..stop bashing her go help her

    (5)(2)
  6. Looks like both the mother and child needs help and prayers,come together and be a part of the solution. Stop blaming left right and centre

    (4)(0)
  7. some childmakers in de place cause nuff problems. many are very vested in what their legs have to offer rather than taking good care of their children. so in their life man come first and child last or nowhere on on the list. often the men are useless. because they there for a good time. and have nothing to offer child. then the child makers move on, looking for another dollar and taking care of their "needs". child is not important in that whole scenario because its all about the childmakers. forget the kids. then fast foward 12 years, de boy or girl start giving trouble. child makers complaining and crying fake crocodile tears forgetting that they were never there when they were needed. and now grannies not picking up the slack to raise no kids. they too busy . so the vicious cycle continue; the child maker become granny still have no time and grandaddy still doing his rum and having no work. then the ghettoes get bigger, crime wave take over because of too many left over kids with no mama and papa. sad state of affairs in lucia today.

    (2)(0)
  8. I have known this family for some time now. I agree that this nine year old is a delinquent kid, one if not given the appropriate attention will ended up on the other side of the law. But how did he become this way. His being in foster care from the age of two should tell the story. One of a mother who never loved a wanted this boy child, who ill treated and cursed him. How delinquent can a two year old be that a mother would have no control over him and resort to abusing him? As for a father, yes he has one but the mother won't dare push him for support and assistance because of the circumstances under which this child was conceived.

    The state has gotten involved many times and rightfully so. However, this very state has failed this child for it failure to identify proper loving and caring foster parents. In his many placements he ended up being abused and therefore his mother's ill treatment appeared to be minor hence his return to her.

    This year the Vieux Fort police got into his life, how and why I don't know. But within this short period everyone connected to him and knows him has spoken of this remarkable difference in appearance. From a child who looked under fed to a well groomed and dressed young man. In a discussion with one of his teachers I learnt that while not perfect, there has been a remarkable difference in his appearance, performance in class. The teacher laughingly stated that you cannot now tell him apart from the others. His hair is always well groomed, his uniforms properly ironed and he no longer comes to school hunger. He has actually put on weight.

    I have stood by and admired the Vieux Police officers as they drop off this child every evening. One can clearly see the love which they have for him as they see him off to his grand mothers home. I want to commend them for stepping into the life of this child. Their involvement is a God sent. To those who describe him as a little criminal in the making, I must say that I hope they are wrong for if everyone of us were to provide a helping hand, maybe like the police did, we may have fewer criminals in our midst.

    As for the mother, she has never set the example for her two children. Very often she can be heard cursing her mother, telling her the worst things imaginable. All that in the presence of the two children. Very often she can be heard calling the little boy bullar, saying that's what he will become and is bordellias he will go when he grows up. So what do one expect of this now nine year old if he is continually treated this way. The mother turned him into the monster he has become. But I do hope that he will find love and affection in his new home and become a productive member of our society.

    As for her daughter, I hope the state, like the boy finds a home for her as she is most times left in the house at nights unattended with a burning candle.

    (5)(0)
  9. Tamara is very disrespectful, she has told her mother she is a frog. Yet, that same mother has provided love and comfort to the nine year old she rejected. This lady has God's favor , as if it were not for her, this child would be exactly what tamara wished him to be, a criminal. The child was saved by the police, his grand mother, human services and the courts. Divine intervention I call it.

    (0)(0)
  10. This nine year old, has been assaulted, starved, cursed out, kicked out and branded as a bulla and loveless by the one who gave birth to him. He however, is a very intelligent and affectionate young man who is very energetic. Tamara Raveneau has been arrested and charged for parental abuse and neglect. She has deprived this child of the perquisites such as his glasses and school books provided to him by the state just because she felt she could have. The police officers got involved in the life of this nine year old because she wounded him in the head with a stone. Now tell me, which loving mother does that? The police officers and social worker worked tirelessly to relieve Tamara of the nine year old she deems a burden. It has finally happened. He has gotten a wonderful foster mother and an extended family in the members of the RSLPF. He is about to embark on a new leg of his journey. I wish him all the best and may God continue to guide him and the people who love him.

    (3)(0)
  11. The nine year old is a child who has been abused by Tamara Raveneau for years. She has been charged for abusing him and sent to counselling sessions. This is a mother who has insulted, belittled, beaten and straved her son. Her favorite nickname for him is BULLA. Children respond to the treatment they receive. This young man is naturally intelligent and full of life despite his predicament. The principal and teachers at the school he attends sees him as a gem and his mother as a parasite.The police officers and social worker who assisted in removing him in the mothers care saved his life. This young man has now gotten an amazing forster mother and an extended family in the RSLPF and is about to emback on a new journey; a life free of the one who gave birth to him. I wish him all the best and may God continue to guide him and those who opened their hearts and homes to him.

    (2)(0)
  12. This child clearly has psychological issues that both the mother and the system cannot handle. The child probably has other mental issues and his 'rebellion' is because he cannot understand his own feelings. I don't blame the mother because she probably was raised to hit a child if he is disrespectful. She does not know better. The foster places probably have no education on dealing with a child with 'issues'. At the end of the day, the child will become a statistic because we don not have the facilities or education to diagnose and treat children and even adults with behavioural and psychological issues. No one to blame here.

    (1)(2)
    • Looks like her mother can do a better job as he appears to be turning the corner physically and psychologically. He will also have more love toward her as his mother had leveled much abuse towards the both of them.
      We choose our lives paths, trying to make urself pretty at the expense of ur chiildren is just not right. Make some sacrifice then we can see ur commitment and assist.

      (1)(0)
  13. There are alot of people who are parents who have no idea what ADHD is.
    Do your reasearch before blaming the child or the parent.
    In my opinion not enough is done on the island when it comes to disorders in children.I belive this is something the New Minister of Health should address.Sadly many teachers at schools are clueless in how to treat kids which have been diagnosed with that particular disorder.

    (2)(0)
    • Some kids here have been improperly diagnosed and drugged here. When taken off island to physicians to recognise this.
      It's not a good feeling to recognise u can drug ur kid for life incorrectly with side effects for his lifetime.
      This is scary.

      (0)(0)
  14. As much as youre my uncles daughter tamara we have never had any issue but ik of things that you have done to ure neices and the things you use to do baby you cannot be a mother and be doing those things i never even new you had a child and the wemen you use to be with doing jamet they should have told you that your son would not resoect you because of your life habbit baby ik things stress us out but all i can say to you is try to change ure life for your son to see yoyve changed and you wanna be there for him and be a mom and not a see you now and see you 3 days after baby im praying for you i hope the court hears your plea and gives you more time to get things right with ure son cuzo

    (0)(0)
  15. YOU ARE THE CAUSE TAMMY. REMEMBER HOW MUCH YOU'VE CURSED PEOPLE FOR YOUR SON. HE WAS ALWAYS RIGHT. SHOW YOUR MOM LOVE AND HE MAY CHANGE.

    (9)(6)
  16. So WHERE IS THE FATHER. STORY IS NOT COMPLETEWITHOUT THE INFO ON THE FATHER

    (17)(4)
  17. O boy poor jab I pray that he gets all the help he can so that he can get better so help him God

    (12)(0)
  18. Ttrue

    (0)(1)
  19. He's only nine and he's already behaving so naughty. I do not want to know him when another nine years is added to him. Look out St.Lucia a menace to society in the making.

    (13)(30)
  20. I wouldn't put this fool in charge of an animal she he on my Facebook page and highly disrespectful!

    (10)(8)
  21. anonymous , u appear to have all the answers and questions to whatever is reported on SLNO. u have any substantial to do rather than put people down? get a life, u babbling idiot! THERES NOT AN ARTICLE THAT WOULD BE POSTED IF U DONT PUT UR TWO CENTS. i wonder what ur life is like? are u perfecto? not a blemish? not a stain? if not, jus grant urself a favour. die and go to heaven fool.

    (10)(4)
    • Be Objective & Observant

      Ummmm. "Anonymous" is not just one person. The name is automatically generated for contributors who did not submit a name. Probably you'd notice that if you took your time to read to understand and not to respond.

      You can tell because that "Anonymous" sometimes uses bad grammar and other times he/she uses proper grammar. Then spells correctly and other times do not. And most importantly, you can tell their level of thinking by what and how they express their selves. It is NOT always the same.

      (3)(0)
  22. Shut your rear she's not passing her rage on her child she is deciplening in the best way she could've. It's true the father wasn't mentioned in this case but if he wanted to be a part he would've

    (22)(5)
  23. So Weh the father y'all passing Ur rage on the dam kids

    (7)(19)

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