Boyfriend was going to miss my birthday party to “knock that too”

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Boyfriend was going to miss my birthday party to “knock that too”


Dear Willie:
 I come from a Christian family. I had been without a boyfriend for a long time up until a few months ago.

Before we started dating I prayed about it to God a lot, asking for guidance to make the right decision. What attracted me to my boyfriend apart from his personality was that he is also a Christian, trying to be celibate. After some time, I felt God answered me and I decided to be with him, make the relationship official and introduce him to my family.

A couple months later we slipped off the wagon and had sexually intercourse once. However, I asked for forgiveness and took up a vow of celibacy again.

A couple weeks after that, my boyfriend gave me his phone to read piece of a conversation, but I ended up scrolling up a bit further than he expected and read something which alarmed me. He was planning on missing out on my birthday party and going to a party with another girl because he wanted to “knock that too.” I confronted him about it and he admitted to it. I asked him if he still wants to do that. He said no.

Willie I have forgiven him for that and believe we have moved past that. But my problem is that he does not try to make enough time for me. Sometimes two weeks would pass without us seeing each other. When we do make dates, he often does not show up, giving different excuses: his mother is sick, or he is tired, or he had to work late.

I understand things do come up, but I feel like I’m being stood up way too often. Quality time is really important to me and I have spoken to him about this several times. My boyfriend would start making more of an effort to spend time with me but then he resorts back to his old ways. What should I do Willie?

Sincerely
Aggravated

Dear Aggravated: You’re a wonderful lady. I believe your boyfriend’s attention is somewhere else. I do not believe he has no time for you.

Let me be brutally honest. In my opinion, I believe your boyfriend is getting sex elsewhere. He is not getting sex from you, so he is probably giving the attention to the person who is giving him some nookie.

The  conversation was the icing on the cake, proof of infidelity. Missing your birthday party to have sex with someone? Catch a flight – not LIAT – out of this relationship. I believe he has already “knocked that” or he is continuously “knocking it” or “knocking a lot of that”.

It shows your boyfriend cannot be trusted. Just dump the *** and call it a day. Find someone who respects your decision and has time for you. God will send you someone who is worthy of your trust and faith.

Willie

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Dear Willie is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday exclusively on this site. The responses by this column are the opinion of the author of Dear Willie and are not to be thought of as counseling or advice. The opinion is based on limited information provided by the user. By requesting a response, the user agrees that both Dr. Willie and Andrews Media Services Corp/St. Lucia News Online are not to be held liable for any damages to the user or any third party associated with the user. 

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37 COMMENTS

  1. I agree with Willie. Dump Him and wait. Yahuah will send you someone after His own heart. Do not focus on man or boyfriends. Instead focus on making your relationship with the Most High even better. Concentrate on obeying Him in every aspect. Remember Job. Even at his lowest He trusted and obeyed the Father.

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  2. Why are some so harsh with you'll words Who without Sin cast the first stone, This young lady just have to go back to God repent and stay in the faith, Men who truly loves a woman and believes in the same faith as she is would wait with her until Marriage it's not an easy task but she have to keep strong and don't get lead off again. There will always be sheep in wolf clothing. So watch out for the Red Flags!!!!

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  3. sex before marriage, my girl u broke one of the principle of christianity, fornication. what were you thinking.

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  4. Some advice to you my dear if you are a christian stick to your own kind look for a nice guy in the church where you'll can come to an understanding, if you knew you were a christian why be in a relationship with an outsider I dis agree with some people not all men love sex some times we men just want someone we can just chill with. no one is gonna make your choice for you its all up to you and the love you have for this guy, but it will be stupid to be in a relationship where your other half don't wanna be faithful, from time he spend weeks with out seeing you thenn my girl reading the text says a lot to why he doesn't come around often. Maybe he aleady knocking that

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    • am real man i think you should read the story again here let me pin point it to you (Before we started dating I prayed about it to God a lot, asking for guidance to make the right decision. What attracted me to my boyfriend apart from his personality was that he is also a Christian, trying to be celibate. After some time, I felt God answered me and I decided to be with him, make the relationship official and introduce him to my family. - See more at: https://www.stlucianewsonline.com/boyfriend-was-going-to-miss-my-birthday-party-to-knock-that-too/#sthash.FEO7kDjS.dpuf) so inthat case he wasnt an outsider

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  5. BY sayin he wanted to knock that too, means he knocked ur poom already so the new girl is fresh meet for him to knock. this guy is not trustworthy and not gd boyfriend or husband material. to be planning on cheating and then showing signs of cheating so early in a relationship m m m nope. drop him

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  6. Dats a good scenario great even bcuz my girl a relationship is like a job u dont get wat u want u simply find another job i understand ur whole christian vyb eh get me wrong but if u no ur bible very well u will no dat 1. da bible was in a different era from now and 2. if u still wanna be like dem idiotic christians dat say it still applies to this era well my girl da tym of bible marriage was initiated through sex not a ring on da finger so wake up girl stop trying to be celibate for so long even da holiest of men wud have a prob and maybe wud beat dat by der self if dey cah get a woman to do it for dem

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  7. A Christian and he peck the fruit in a few months! So one can only imagine if you were of this world how fast it would have happened.

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  8. You should have never let him stab it in the first place! Now de man know what cocout taste like of course he will want it all the time. And if you are not giving it up he will find somebody that will.

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  9. Great advice Willie.... Move on with your life girl he's entertaining himself else where.... You give it up once he'll expect for u to give it up again!

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  10. Religion takes everything that is normal and natural to our DNA as human beings and makes it wrong, evil and dirty as a means of controlling its followers.

    Your sexuality does not belong to your religion, nor your church, nor your pastor. It belongs to you. Stop suppressing this natural and normal side of you in the name of this falsified religion they call Christianity. If you're not embracing your sexuality as an attractive young woman based on some manmade religious doctrine that they put in the bible they wrote claiming that you should have no sex before marriage, then trust me, the jabal will be more than happy to do so.

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    • Perhaps she could find or wait for a man who is suppressing his natural sexual urges based on so called man made religious doctrine who has no need for a 'jabal' hmmmn. Such celibate human beings do exist!

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  11. He wants sex n since u not giving him sex hes having fun with someone else! Besides whats the big deal its not like u are a virgin?! PS niether you or your so called boyfriend are christians!

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    • WELL I BET YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN WHO HAS NEVER SINNED.AND I BET YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR BIBLE; TO SAY SOMEONE IS NOT A CHRISTIAN BECAUSE THEY SINNED.ONLY ONE MAN WALKED THIS EVER WITHOUT SINNING.THERE IS SOMETHING CALLED REPENTANCE AND FORGIVENESS!

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  12. My girl it seem like your guy found a woman with porn star potential,and as a result your conservative prudish Christian self has been kicked to the curb. As men we like the karma sutra type love making as well; but you need to balance that with some fifty shades of grey "whole chuew par bon"type sex.

    Am sure your faith will lead you to that low libido, declining testosterone man that you seek... good luck with your search

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  13. I love your response to this willie, My girl, its best to cut your losses because you will continue to forgive and forgive and get hurt over and over again, because people like him tend to take advantage of having someone like you someone who he knows will always have his back, don't be someone's 2nd choice, God didn't mean for it to be that way.

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  14. That guy really jus wanted sex n dats it as u say u did it once n promise not to do it again so yh hiz gonna go look 4 another fish but trust me u will find someone much better to plz u

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  15. boy #AA you said everything i had too i cyan say no more. I respect the religion but men and women wired totally differently. When you eh know how the cat tasting you eh missing it but as long as you get one taste pap its over. # young love.

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  16. I agree with Willie. This guy may be getting it elsewhere. What you should do is spend time in prayer and trust you will find a good christian guy. One who loves the Lord with all his heart and who will love you in return.

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  17. Christian Family my foot.
    You are no Christian lady.

    You don't even have the capacity to keep your legs close.

    The hypocrisy of some of you just boggles the Damn Mind.

    You were ready for the Good wood.
    Just come clean!!!

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    • It seems that you have no one to talk to and resort to saying negative things to conjure up a reaction, just so you can have a conversation. Cast the first stone at the young lady and see how many will eventually hit you back!

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  18. My girl he wasn't meant for you, yo will find someone better than that cause if he loved you he would stay with you and not look for anyone else

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  19. All guys want punani and if you won't give it they WILL get it elsewhere. Unless of course if you believe in Santa Claus and his reindeer.....well that's another story.

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  20. Girl u r new to this whole relationship thing, so here is so advice. Men love sex . We can't get enough of it. If you cannot pass it then stay single until. I understand the whole church thing but you cannot buy jab ah sack. Its only a few Christian men and women who enter marriage as virgins. Ur bf has already tasted the honey (urs too) trust me he cannot and will not do without it anymore.

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