Dear Willie: I met this guy on Blackberry Messenger through my close friend about five months ago. At the time I was going through a break-up and he was always there to give me advice and guidance. He is jovial and never serious about anything.
I started developing feelings for him and so did he. I know it was too early for that but it just felt right and it’s been four months since we have been together. We exchanged Facebook passwords because we trusted each other and he said there is nothing to hide.
Three months into the relationship I discovered this conversation where he asked the girl to spend the night at a guest house and lots of sex talk. I confronted him and he said that the girl was his classmate from times and he always speaks to her that way. We sorted things out and I promised never to go on his profile again.
However, last week I decided to see what’s popping and there was another convo, this time with a 14-year-old child and he is telling her ‘we can be friends with benefits or f** friends’. I was pissed at him the entire day then I brought it to his attention. I told him I can’t take it again and I’m through. He said that he was bored and he doesn’t do little children, he was just playing around. The next morning he told me that we should break up, it would be better for both of us.
What hurts me is that I told my mom about the guy. My mom likes him and I have gone out of my way on many occasions to have sex and make time with him.
Willie I love this guy. I regret the fact that I let him go because now I want him back. I told him let’s get back together and he said no, it’s better if we are close friends.
I know I deserve better but please tell me what to do Willie.
Dear Miss: Sometimes some people are better off just being friends in your life. This sentence in the first paragraph of your letter was a big clue: “He is jovial and NEVER SERIOUS ABOUT ANYTHING.”
I guess he was not serious about the relationship. He cannot be serious when he gave you the password to his Facebook account and said he has nothing to hide yet he blatantly uses that same account to cheat?
Then there is this child he is entertaining with sex talk. This is no excuse but I would somewhat pity him if the girl fooled him about her real age. But if he was aware that she was 14 all along, then that’s a red alert: this guy is trouble.
I give him some credit for breaking off the relationship but that was something you should have done before he did!
I also believe this dude is a player. I doubt he was serious about anything from the beginning. He was a great friend, and probably that’s all he wanted, but some females always believe that every guy who talks nice to them deserves a space in their lives.
Nothing is wrong with having a great guy friend without letting off some cat. Sometimes it is good to squeeze your vagina and tell it to behave. Sex and the need to be loved all the time, most times get us into unhealthy relationships.
Why do people believe being single for sometime is a bad thing?
He probably developed fake feelings to get into your underwear. And it was too early to start commitment.
The signs are clear about this guy. If you want to go back to him, it is your choice but don’t write me back when the sh** hits the fan, if you decide to reunite with him. He already told you he is not interested.
Email letters to [email protected] Letters are strictly confidential and total privacy maintained. Also see disclaimer below.
Dear Willie is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday exclusively on this site. The responses by this column are the opinion of the author of Dear Willie and are not to be thought of as counseling or advice. The opinion is based on limited information provided by the user. By requesting a response, the user agrees that both Dr. Willie and Andrews Media Services Corp/St. Lucia News Online are not to be held liable for any damages to the user or any third party associated with the user.