After months of sex, female still doesn’t know how to express feeling

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After months of sex, female still doesn’t know how to express feeling


Dear Willie:
I’ve been seeing this guy for five months now. We don’t see each other every day but we communicate every day.

We go out once in a while. Every time we speak, he’s always busy doing work. I really want to ask him about where I stand with him but don’t know where to start off. Twice I told him that I need to have a serious conversation with him when he’s not busy, but he never tells me when he’s not busy.

We sleep together but yet still I need to know because I really do like him. I tried to express my feeling to him but again I don’t know how to start.

Every time I would text him and ask him that if he’s seeing someone else and he says “no bbz”. He’s not from St. Lucia but he works here. Can you please help me talk to this guy?

Dear Miss: Five months communicating and having sex with a guy and you haven’t told him how you feel? You had the courage to sleep with him but not the courage to discuss a relationship?

He wasn’t too busy to have sex with you right? He wasn’t too busy to answer other questions right?

In fact, that was the first thing you should have done – clarify his intentions before sleeping with him.

What’s interesting is that you had the guts to ask if he’s seeing anyone – which he responded to – but not the guts to simply ask “Are you interested in a serious relationship?”

The most I can say now is: ask him if he’s interested in a relationship with you. If he says no, you will feel hurt, but do not feel used, because you put yourself in this situation. Just be prepared for any answer.

On another note, if this guy wanted a relationship,  I believe he would have said or hinted something by now. After all, it’s been five months since you’ve been giving him milk and meat without ‘(Vagina Added Tax) VAT’.

Willie

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Dear Willie is published every Monday, Wednesday and Friday exclusively on this site. The responses by this column are the opinion of the author of Dear Willie and are not to be thought of as counseling or advice. The opinion is based on limited information provided by the user. By requesting a response, the user agrees that both Dr. Willie and Andrews Media Services Corp/St. Lucia News Online are not to be held liable for any damages to the user or any third party associated with the user.  

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45 COMMENTS

  1. my girl, you fall under the category of "friends with benefits" . so stop wasting your time, energy and efforts. after 5 months, he would have shown some form of interest. take your milk and meat and save it for someone that will respect and love you.

    ps. and don't be sleeping with a guy so easily.

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  2. Wow. Sleep first and ask questions later. I hope she doesn't blame the guy if he packs up and shows up years later making the same demands

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  3. aa tan sa... 5 months n you still uh know where you stand. but im sure you know very well to open up your legs when he ask. chupz

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  4. Dem lucian women really nasty, you need help communicating with the man but you sleeping with him.Know wonder HIV is on the rise!!!!!!!!!NASTYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  5. "Twice I told him that I need to have a serious conversation with him when he’s not busy, but he never tells me when he’s not busy."
    ---------------------------------------------------------------------
    Big mistake. Most men don't like serious conversation. They'll avoid it as much as possible.

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  6. Willie, your answers never cease to make me laugh but at the same time I look forward to those letters. There is a lot to be learned from such situations. But Missy, most foreign men do have. Their stock back at home. Prepare to get hurt!

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  7. after reading this I am realizing that this is actually happening, persons are quicker to jump in the sheets than having a real conversation on what they are actually feeling, their desires and wants. Like I have said over and over. Sex is so easy and readily available that it is hard to cultivate a relationship. On the other hand for you to be sleeping with a man for so long and don't know where you stand is a huge problem. A cycle that is already being perpetuated where think their puss can get them where they want. Again.. it can get you there but cannot keep you there. hence why you not sure of your role in his life.

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  8. I think it's pretty obvious what's going on here. The man just want to flex without any commitment.He is getting what he wants out of the relationship so you should get what you want also. Or at least find some mutual ground. Otherwise your not really benefiting by being there. Anyway that's just my advice but personally i would never try to save a HO!!!

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  9. This person writes and behaves like a very young , inexperienced individual . She doesn't seem ready for a relationship . My advise keep your legs close till you' 're ready for a relationship pursue a better education back ground and seek the Lord .

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  10. This writes and behaves like a very young , inexperienced individual . She doesn't seem ready for a relationship . My advise keep your legs close till you' 're ready for a relationship pursue a better education back ground and seek the Lord .

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  11. I think deep down you already know the answer to your questions, maybe that's why you have not asked him. If this guy was interested in a long-term relationship you would have known.

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  12. Women claim men have no common sense but it looks like its the women writing these ridiculous letters that seem to lack common sense. The answers are always right in their faces yet still they need Willie help to figure it out.After sleeping with a man for 5 months now you want to know how he feel about you, baby what you guys are is friends with benefits don't get it twisted

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  13. If this had been a Lucian man you were seeing you would have gone all "gangster" by now. But is a "foreigner" you dating; so your perception is he would treat you better.You enmeshed in a deep state of denial,the reality is you are his side dish,but you trying to convince yourself that you are going to become the the main course;because is only Lucian men that lie and cheat.
    Oh by the way Willie a Proper Performing Penis is exempt from VAT

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  14. After u spread your legs u want to know where u stand,this guy won't give u an honest ans. My lady this guys is only using u while he is in St lucia when he is gone u r done.

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  15. stop confusing sex for "i really like him", most ppl dont even know its the sex you really like, well from a guys point of view trust me if he wanted a relationship he would have already asked you that question clearly its just the booty call love. straight.

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  16. Poor you,u shud have ask since day one your'll met about his intentions with you n how deeply he likes you

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